It’s getting close to Cup season, which means that the fate of a handful of players will be up to a captain’s discretion. Ask any Solheim Cup or Ryder Cup captain about the hardest part of the job, and many will say captain’s picks. Not simply because it can make or break the legacy of a captain, but because it’s hard to crush someone’s spirit.
Whether it’s on the playground field, in the dating world or on a job search, it’s impossible to escape the feeling of being unwanted.
Everyone experiences rejection.
What often follows rejection is a period of sadness, frustration and then – more waiting.
In Lamentations, Jeremiah writes, “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, ‘The Lord is my portion; therefore, I will wait for him.”(Lamentations 3:22-24, NIV)
We often look back in gladness (and relief!) at the seemingly perfect doors the Lord kept closed. One thing I’ve learned about the waiting period is to look for opportunities God lays at my feet that could not have been done had I not been in a period of waiting.
Let’s say, for example, that I really wanted to cover a certain tournament and didn’t get the assignment. What am I learning, who am I serving, what am I working toward during that week at home that I otherwise wouldn’t have been able to do? How am I becoming better prepared for the next assignment?
The hard “no” of a rejection is often simply a “not yet.” Because “the Lord is my portion,” it’s possible to be content while also still desperately seeking His best.
Rejection is a necessary part of life, but sometimes we can unnecessarily make those around us feel unwanted or unnoticed.
My singles pastor used to call a group of us “the holy huddle,” and while he said it with a smile, I knew what he meant. We were deeply involved in the ministry, but when we all sat together during corporate worship, it didn’t give off a very “inviting” vibe.
I regret that now. I wish we had spread out and made newcomers and those longing for connection feel more welcome more often. If I’m honest, I still struggle with that sometimes.
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” – Colossians 3:12 (NIV)
Whether it’s turning someone down for a second date, a second interview or the invitation to be a four-ball partner, compassion must be at the heart of all communication. We must share in heartbreak.
PRAYER: Father God, we’re so grateful that you know what’s best for us. Even when the pain of rejection stings our soul, we rejoice in the hope of what’s to come. Help us to treat others with the same kind of compassion we’d wish to receive when “no” or “not now” is the answer.